We like to pretend that we have rules on our trivia team – don’t cross the streams, no touching of the hair and face, no wire hangers, you don’t talk about fight club, always check the back seat, if you meet yourself from the past do not interact with them, never go full retard (yes that is politically incorrect but it’s a movie quote from Tropic Thunder) and most importantly?

Never wager big points on sportball questions! The only exception being that the question is so easy that even I would know the answer quickly (like which NBA player was Roger Murdock in the movie Airplane! and any number of questions in which the answer might be Larry Bird). As you can imagine, we were not keen on following rules on this trivia night! But we collaborated very, very well in ensuring that game two was going straight into the toilet from the very beginning! And that is exactly what happened!

But our spirits were high, we were enjoying each other’s company, and as always, enjoying some off-color jokes! In the long, long ago, I might’ve been concerned that we dropped one place in the overall season standings for the bar, but now? Meh!

We finished in 12th overall for the night with 78 points. We didn’t manage to think of both real-life dudes country singer Shania Twain sang about in some song I’ve never, ever heard or listened to on purpose. At least it wasn’t yet another trivia question about THAT song! You know the song I mean…

No, that is not Billy Joel in Hell! Or IS it? 😉 But you know what song is associated with that image. And I’m not going to speak any more of it here (grrr)!

And without any further chatter or bitching about pop songs from 1989 that mention tons of people and historic events, how about some abbreviated trivia questions?

Round One –

1 Athletics – Other than marathon or half-marathon, what is the only non-metric running distance recognized by World Athletics, the governing body of track and field?

2 Airports – The airport designated with the IATA code DCA is located on the banks of what river?

3 Emmy Awards – Actor Jon Hamm was nominated eight times for a primetime Emmy Award for oustanding lead actor in a drama series for playing what character? Two possible answers were accepted for this.

4 Rap Firsts – What hip-hop artist born Lana Michele Boorer released the 1989 album “Eyes on This” which was the first album by a solo woman rapper to reach the top 200 on the Billboard charts? FB clue. We got all of these correct.

Mystery Round One – Visual

We only got two points out of this round…not great!

Round Two –

5 Literary Characters – Nick Carraway, Jordan Baker and Myrtle Wilson are central characters in what novel? It took me a minute, but the names Jordan and Myrtle clicked in my brain. Also I watched a 15 minute version of this story on YouTube recently. Yes, that is more than enough time to tell this story!

6 Illness – From June 2009 to August 2010, the World Health Organization declared a pandemic caused by the H1N1 influenza virus – an illness more commonly known by what name? Funny, I was just talking about diseases blamed on animals not too long ago! Spoiler for ya!

7 Abbreviations – What do the letters CD stand for in the context of banking?

8 Slogans – “Plop, Plop, Fizz, Fizz is the slogan for what product? For a nerd bonus point, what company has owned this product since 1978? Missed the bonus, got this round all correct except for the bonus point. Don’t worry, the mystery rounds will keep us from being too cocky! Not to mention the final question in game one! Speak of the Devil…

Mystery Round Two –

Movie Remakes

Identify the original movie inspiring the following remakes with different titles.

M1 – The Magnificent Seven

M2 – Flubber

M3 – The Departed

M4 – Guess Who?

Missed #2 and #3.

We were in fifth with 42 points going into the final.

Final Category – Song Lyrics

What two celebrities are mentioned by name in the 1998 single “That Don’t Impress Me Much” by Shania Twain?

Dave managed to come up with one, and we put in our best guess for dude #2…nope.

Look, I respect that Shania Twain was a total rags to riches story and that she sold a crap ton of records, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to start listening to her music on purpose any time soon! Country music just isn’t my thing, unless it’s songs about deals with the Devil with fiddle music, a random Dolly Parton tune or two, and maybe that one about the ring of fire by Johnny Cash.

On to game two? Let’s totally f— this game up, shall we? 🙂 Sure thing, with gusto!

Round Three –

9 Quarterbacks – Which team drafted Cam Newton first overall in the 2011 NFL draft? MISS FOR EIGHT! Yes, let’s destroy this game! On that note…

10 Measures – What common U.S. measurement is equal to 14.79 millileters? MISS FOR SEVEN! Dare we screw up the next one for six? Read on to find out!

11 Spin-Offs – What character is the subject of a spin-off of Spongebob SquarePants that debuted in 2021? Yay we gussed correct on this! I always hope that “Maude” will be the answer of a spin-off question!

12 Grammy Awards – And here I whined “No fair that they’re asking about Grammies AND Emmies in the same game (don’t correct me on the spelling).” In all irony, we wound up getting both of the questions correct! Behold:

What was the name of the Grammy-winning hit single by Belgian-Australian singer Gotye that won a Grammy Award for record of the year in 2013?

This was not our actual question, we actually had an audio clip of an instrumental version the song, had to ID the song.

Mystery Round Three –

This Day in History (yay)! I will not be as excited about the next mystery round…

On this day in…

M1 – 1986 – A major nuclear accident took place at what power plant near the town of Pripyat?

M2 – 1977 – What notable night club opened in midtown Manhattan?

M3 – 1865 – Who was killed by Union soldiers on a Virginia farm owned by Richard Garrett?

M4 – 1920 – Canada defeated Sweden 12-1 to win the gold medal in what sport, although it was making its debut at the Summer Olympics?

Got all of these correct. Not to worry, we still have plenty of chances to flush this game right down the toilet! Allow me to poise my finger dramatically over the flushing lever!

Round Four

13 – Borders – Within three, how many degrees north latitude marked the border between North and South Korea prior to the Korean War?

14 – 2020s Films – Before writing down the question, I wrote down a little wish – “Please be about something we’ve seen!” I know, I know…that’s not what you say when you’re trying to f— up a game, is it? Uh…

Released in 2021, what is the most recently released movie in the James Bond franchise? Yay we knew this! Though I was kind of hoping it would be about “The Menu,” which I just watched. If you ask me if it’s about cannibalism, I’ll give you an honest answer! Will you be able to eat a s’more again? Well, that’s totally up to you!

15 – Honors – Mary Walker, a doctor who volunteered with the Union Army, is the only woman to have been awarded what highest decoration in the U.S. Armed Forces?

16 – Drinks – In addition to tequila, name one of the two ingredients in a Tequila Sunrise cocktail, as specified by the International Bartenders Association? Name both for a bonus point. Got this for the points and bonus. Got all of these correct, now how about a mystery round about Japanese Prefectures to keep our losing streak alive? OK!

Mystery Round Four –

Pick the four correct names of actual Japanese Prefectures from the following list:

Chiba, Fuji, Hokkaido, Kobe, Nagasaki, Okinawa, Yokohoma

We got two of these correct. We had 35 points going into the final, which was probably last place or something…

Final Category – Elections

What two candidates received the vast majority of electoral votes in the first US election in which all 50 U.S. states participated?

Well, we tried crawling out of the toilet, but I guess we were getting used to the water! Yes,, we got this right, but we couldn’t escape the bottom of the heap.

Unsure when we will do another live game, that depends on lots of things!

As always, Go Pods, and stay classy, John Wilkes Booth!

Answers are in the comments (updated April 29).