There has been a lot of buzz lately about “advent calendars.” Putting 24 different kinds of goodies into a box and having one of them for each day from December 1 to December 24. Aldi grocery stores have been selling cheese advent calendars, you can get beer/liquor advent calendars, candy advent calendars, Playboy playmate advent calendars (just kidding about that one), yada yada.
Founders Brewing Co. based in Grand Rapids, MI recently came under fire for selling a beer advent calendar for $150. Yes, that’s a CASE of beer for $150. And no, there isn’t a $50 bill hidden inside the box. Yet people have still complained about it, even after being foolish enough to buy it.
Advent calendars seem like a fun idea, but I’m kind of a late bloomer when it comes to celebrating holidays. So I was thinking – Why not just do a “Twelve Days of Christmas Beers” thing instead? Would the idea seem cooler if I turned it into a song? Let’s find out!:
To the tune of “Twelve Days of Christmas” (don’t try drinking all of these beers or you WILL die):
On the first day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…a wine made from lots of barley…
On the second day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…two German dunkels and a wine made from lots of barley…
On the third day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…three hefeweizens, two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley…
On the fourth day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…four quadrupels, three hefeweizens, two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley…
On the fifth day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…five golden ales…four quadrupels…three hefeweizens two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley…
On the sixth day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…six hazy IPAs five…golden ales…four quadrupels…three hefeweizens two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley…
On the seventh day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…seven sour saisons…six hazy IPAs…five golden ales…four quadrupels…three hefeweizens two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley…
On the eighth day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…eight English milk stouts…seven sour saisons….six hazy IPAs….five golden ales…four quadrupels…three hefeweizens two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley…
On the ninth day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…nine fruity lambics…eight English milk stouts…seven sour saisons six hazy IPAs…five golden ales…four quadrupels…three hefeweizens two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley….
On the tenth day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…10 specialty beers…nine fruity lambics…eight English milk stouts…seven sour saisons six hazy IPAs…five golden ales…four quadrupels….three hefeweizens two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley….
On the eleventh day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…eleven stouts for sipping….10 specialty beers…nine fruity lambics…eight English milk stouts….seven sour saisons…six hazy IPAs…five golden ales….four quadrupels…three hefeweizens two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley…
On the twelfth day of Christmas…my true love sent to me…twelve doppelbocks…eleven stouts for sipping…10 specialty beers…nine fruity lambics…eight English milk stouts…seven sour saisons…six hazy IPAs…five golden ales…four quadrupels…three hefeweizens…two German dunkels and a wine made of lots of barley….
hebspeaks 