In Other News, I Got Ejected From a Dentist Office!

I had a dental appointment yesterday and was sent home because I was…

hotbloodedforeigner

I didn’t pass a required temperature check for entering the building! It was checked maybe three times or so with one of those proximity thermometers (which I’m wondering if they can really be trusted, but I’ll get to that in a bit), and my reading of 100.5 was one tenth of a degree too high to be allowed on the ever exciting ride called “The Dentist Chair.” My visit was only necessary to have sutures removed after having a bone graft procedure two weeks ago. So…sterilize some tweezers and borrow mom’s seam ripper then?

So I left for about 10 minutes and visited a nearby liquor store (we were out of vodka). When I came back for another temperature reading, they said it was ONE HUNDRED AND TWO DEGREES? WTF? How in the world could my temperature rise nearly two degrees in the span of 10 minutes? That’s when I started mentally calling shenanigans on those fancy digital thermometers! From here on out, I’ll be better prepared, because…

thermometer

I went out and bought my own thermometer today! When I took a reading about an hour ago it was 99.0. I’m surmising maybe just the act of going to the f—ing dentist and driving into the great white suburban, strip mall-laden Hell of Livonia MI was enough in and of itself to raise my temperature! Could also be any number of factors associated with what I will only describe as the weirdness of womens’ bodies! Ovulation can cause temperature increases too, apparently. I guess some women who are trying to have babies take their temperatures to see when they’re ovulating? I wouldn’t know, I didn’t have any kids, but occasionally I hear other women talking about this kind of stuff!

Truth be told, I don’t think I’ve ever been a “98.6” gal. I was also ejected from a blood drive when I was in my 20s because my temperature was too high! Maybe I just run a bit hotter than others? Would explain a lot, like my distaste for high temperatures. I don’t handle extreme heat well.

The last time I had an actual fever was on a cabin trip in October! You can read more about that in this blog. On the first night, I was alternately sweating and shivering, and eventually the fever broke. That’s how I learned that when you have a fever, apparently you have to pee…like a LOT! I was going about once per hour during the night, which was a tad inconvenient since the “real” bathroom was about 200 feet away! So let’s just say I moistened the pine  needles outside the cabin a bit!

After that happened, whatever it was I had degraded into something flu-like that I just couldn’t shake completely for nearly a month. Nasty, nasty coughs, tiredness, lethargy. Everyone else is telling me that there is no way I could have had COVID-19 that early, and well, OK, I’ll buy that. At least I feel like I’m prepared for it now!

Back to the original topic of this silly blog, I have rescheduled my appointment and will be back there Monday. I’ll be ready! I’ll have my own thermometer, and I’ll take some ibuprofen before hand (it’s a fever reducer)! No way am I getting kicked out of a place I don’t want to visit anyway!

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