The Mental Floss web site has released their list of the 20 most annoying songs to date, which you can view here.
Well, well, well! Reading that list inspired me to do my OWN list of the most annoying songs ever made! And as for MF’s list, I will have to say I DISAGREE about Berlin’s Take My Breath Away being an “annoying” song (I actually like that one – key changes and all).
Just to be clear, I’m a fairly open-minded person when it comes to music, even if I do believe most stuff recorded in the past 15 years or so is auto-tuned garbage. I like lots and lots of songs from countless genres (not just 80s-90s alternative and disco)!
And here I go with my list, please note, I am NOT including links that will allow you to listen to these horrible, horrible songs (because I happen to love my blog readers too much to do that)! In no particular order…
Most Annoying Songs Ever Recorded (IMHO)
If this song’s jerking, jarring melodies and insipid lyrics aren’t enough to make you hate it, just… LOOK at this guy! Don’t you want to rip off that hat and push it around in the mud? Is that just me?
Yes, I am aware that this is NOT a picture of Whitney Houston! It is, however, a scene from American Psycho, where Christian Bale’s Patrick Bateman character talks at length about his love of Whitney Houston’s music. As for my opinion of this song? I’m going to say just TWO things…Just because you CAN sustain a note for 45 seconds, it doesn’t mean that you SHOULD – and just because you can hit a high note in a certain octave, it doesn’t mean that you should!
Back in 2012, there was a time when you couldn’t AVOID hearing this screechy song in bars! Songs like these I describe as “Millennial Chow.” A trivia host even hinted that there was a “ban” on trivia hosts playing this song (which he disobeyed on his last night of hosting trivia). I don’t know what was worse – hearing the singer howling ‘Touching you…hooo hooo…” or hearing the fans of this song drunkenly sing along with it!
Hey Ho by The Lumineers is one of those songs that when you hear it the first couple of times, you’re like, “Hey, this is a bit…different!” Then when you hear it 10 or more times, it just makes you…stabby. Kind of like what happened with Bobby McFerrin’s Don’t Worry, Be Happy.
While I appreciate the “cathartic” quality of You Oughta Know which chronicles the feelings involved in an ugly breakup, I just can’t abide the actual delivery. If you want to listen to a much better “kiss and tell” song, try You’re So Vain by Carly Simon, which has stood the test of time much better than this horrible, horrible caterwauling piece by Alanis Morrissette. And DON’T get me started on her multiple inaccurate references to irony in Isn’t It Ironic…(take an English 101 class or read a dictionary entry, Alanis).
The “scat” inspired vocal stylings of Martha Wash in this early 1990s track just make me want to pour hot lava into my ears…and that’s really all I have to say about this song…
Familiarity breeds contempt? My college roommate, John, played Sarah McLachlan’s stuff excessively enough to make me seek asylum in a… sensory deprivation chamber. So really, all of her songs would be on “my” list of annoying songs (and sorry, Sarah, NOTHING is better than ice cream). Nowadays, we STILL have to listen to her in those five-minute long “donate some money or all of these cute animals will die right now” commercials (this is why mute buttons on remote controls were created). If you can’t hit a note, try again, Sarah!
Not only will I NEVER forgive this woman for butchering Cat Stevens’ Peace Train (a beloved song from my childhood which wound up being banned from airplay because of Yusuf Islam’s remarks about Salman Rushdie which he has since recanted or claimed were taken out of context)…but I will never forget my brother commandeering MY stereo and playing one of her albums! I don’t care HOW “unique” her voice was (her amazing talent was sounding as though she was constantly short of breath while simultaneously having a frog stuck in her throat) – if I ever have to hear her sing again, just pass me those noise-canceling earbuds quickly – and nobody gets hurt! Oh yes, she also ruined Bruce Springsteen’s Because the Night (famously recorded by Patti Smith). Yes, Springsteen wrote this song, it’s one of at least a couple of songs he wrote that were recorded by other artists (another being Blinded by the Light, performed by Manfred Mann’s Earth Band).