Does Anyone Have the Market Cornered on Childhood Trauma?

I exchanged a few “words” with a friend in a bar last night when he insinuated that just because I never experienced any bullying during my school years because of my sexual orientation, that I haven’t “really” suffered from anything. He also tried to insinuate that if I wasn’t in full support of “gay pride,” that I must be in support of “straight pride.” WRONG! I don’t really support “pride” of ANY kind! Whether you’re straight, gay, lesbian, bi or trans –¬† it’s all equally irrelevant to me. I neither embrace nor judge anyone for their sexual orientation. You can tell me you’re gay – and my reaction will be – “So?” I honestly don’t care. All I care about is whether someone is an asshole – or not. Character uber alles… I do think pedophilia is ….just wrong. Adults having sexual relations with children is just downright disgusting. If you’re an adult and can only get your rocks off while thinking about children in a sexual way, this means you have an illness – and there is likely no cure for it. But I digress…

Gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transsexuals are kind of the “victims” du jour. While I support them in their causes, I do not condone the bullying of ANYONE – whether it be because of their sexual orientation, race, religion, gender, height, weight, intelligence, lifestyle choice, etc. I also support gay marriage and think it’s wrong to fire a person from their job because of their sexual orientation. I don’t really think I owe anyone a proverbial “40 acres and a mule.” My white ancestors may have been greedy colonialist, enslaving, racist, rapey assholes, but I am not…

Let’s see…I was propositioned for sex by a 14 year old boy when I was 8, I was bullied so badly during sixth grade I virtually stopped going to school, I’ve had countless male teachers speak to me in really inappropriate ways and in between all of that grew up being picked on incessantly for being too nerdy, too tall, etc. Sure, this certainly pales in comparison to things you’ll see on screen in Boys Don’t Cry, Mississippi Burning, The Accused and Schindler’s List, but this is NOT a pissing match. You’re not going to “win” just because you suffered “more” than someone else – how twisted is THAT? Nobody “wins” when they’ve suffered.

This doesn’t mean that just because you’re not in one of those “victimized” groups that you haven’t suffered anything during your life. I don’t care if you’re a white straight male, a gay female, overweight, over tall, overly short, too Jewish, too smart or too dumb. ALL of us have likely been bullied or have been forced to suffer during their lives because someone else…didn’t like you (for whatever reason). And if you ever try to tell someone that they haven’t “suffered” enough because they’re too white, too straight, too male, not dark skinned enough or not Jewish enough? Then YOU’RE the bully.

This needs to stop…

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