This global pandemic has turned us all into different people. It’s brought out the worst in some people (well, most people, to be honest), and has also brought out the best in some people. Rather than go into detail about any of that, how about talking about some of the odd things people are saying now – that they would have never said in 2019?

Masked Bandits

Oh I wasn’t ignoring you at the grocery store. I must not have recognized you in your mask.

Don’t forget your mask.

Don’t you hate it when people don’t pull up their masks over their noses? Or wear them on their chins?

Boozy Shenanigans…

Be sure to get a two week supply of booze when you’re at the store.

I wish you could get Kirkland vodka delivered to your house.

Clean, Clean – Everything Clean!

Uh, officer, you’re not smelling booze – you’re smelling hand sanitizer!

You bought me disinfectant wipes? You shouldn’t have! Did you have to call in a favor from the Mafia?

I found a bottle of old bleach in the garage!

Zoom, Zoom….

You’re muted.

My Zoom meeting link isn’t working.

That trivia host was talking too much so I turned off the volume.

Shopping, Shopping, Shopping!

Ask if they do curbside pickup orders.

Can’t find any toilet paper anywhere.

So excited! Hand sanitizer finally back in stock at stores!

Health/Wellness

I was sent home from the dentist because my temperature was too high.

It’s not COVID, it’s just allergies!