If You Try Taking Out a Cephalopod, Chances Are It Will Try Taking You With Them!

Any of you out there see the 1987 film The Lost Boys? I love the movie, I think it’s one of the best fusions of comedy/horror ever done, with the 1985 version of Fright Night being a close second.  Scream gets an honorable mention, but really, I’m not much into slasher films. As for horror, give me vamps and some nice mind-bending horror (aka Hellraiser)!

One of my favorite quotes from The Lost Boys is as follows…wait, I’ll just let a meme do the talking here:


The same, apparently, is true of cephalopods! Though they are skilled underwater predators, to be sure, sometimes bigger predators – such as whales and sharks – will get the best of them. In one case, a dolphin foolishly attempted to make a meal of an octopus, only to get its deadly comeuppance when the octopus strangled the dolphin to death while the octopus was being swallowed whole…read more about that here

About a year ago or so, I went to a trivia game with another female, and afterward, I said I could just walk to another local bar to meet my husband, who was already there. She indignantly said, “No, you’re going to get raped. I’ll drive you there.” I joked about this with another female friend later, who said, “You’d probably put up a good fight.” I told her, “Yeah, I pretty much fight like a cornered rat.” No guarantee I’d win a fight, of course, but knowing what I know about me, I would definitely inflict some defensive wounds, at the very least! This is kind of fitting since the rat is my Chinese zodiac sign, but I digress!


To read more about whale vomit, click here


Another way that octopuses and squids try to take out their attackers is via the only hard/bony parts they have on their bodies – which are the beaks. These are also the only parts of these animals that can become fossilized. Let’s say a sperm whale decides it’s hungry (seriously…when is it NOT hungry?), so it sees a yummy, yummy octopus or squid swimming around and (gulp) pops it into its mouth. All’s well that ends well, right? Sperm whale is no longer hungry, and the octopus didn’t wind up smothering the whale on its way down! All good, right? Nope…the octopus ain’t done trying to take the whale with them! Turns out the sharp beaks of an octopus (and squid) can lacerate the innards of a whale, which can cause some…indigestion.. In defense, the whale’s bile ducts produce a waxy goo called ambergris, which helps the food go down, if you will, and can also wind up on beaches.  Ambergris also can wind up in expensive bottles of perfume  (though synthetics are primarily used in perfumes these days instead of ambergris). Next time you smell cologne or perfume on a woman, just say, “Is that decomposed squid I smell?” You are 100 percent guaranteed to be well on your way to Get Laid City (not)! Fun fact, as gross as it seems, when ambergris ages, the marine/fecal odor subsides and gives way to a sweet earthy scent. How’s THAT for ending this blog on a positive note?


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