As some of you readers know, I was in a very depressive state for the earlier part of this week that extended back into the last half of last week (in the days leading up to a regional trivia tournament). A normal trivia night rolled around last Thursday, and in the hours leading up to the game, I found myself dreading it, so I decided to call it off (I was also pretty exhausted from work that day). I was barely able to hold it together emotionally in certain situations, including while I was at work, but I did as most of humans do in these situations. Tried to “soldier on” anyway. I’m not sure what exactly triggered this specific “episode,” but I’m sure multiple factors were at work.
One of the contributing factors to my stress levels, I think, was…too much trivia. Three weekends during the month of August were pretty much “eaten up” by trivia tournaments. Not just normal games, mind you, but “do or do not” high-stakes games. This doesn’t even take into account the activities leading up to these games (Sporcle Live venue tournament, rustling up players, finding subs, herding the cats, yada yada). I managed to sneak in a weekend of camping between it all, but obviously that wasn’t enough. My cup had runneth over. By the time the third tournament rolled around, I actually kind of dreaded going and wondered if I could find a last-minute sub for myself! This is a big part of the reason I’ve decided to scale back the trivia nights this season and cut back to trying to qualify for finals in only one league.
Not doing well in the trivia tournament may have exacerbated my emotional state a bit! Usually when my team does poorly in a tournament, I shake it off after a couple of days and…move on. It wasn’t happening in this case. I didn’t even want to talk about the game with other players (even a player on my own team who was not in attendance). Aside from sending a congratulatory text to one player last Saturday, I didn’t congratulate any of the players/ teams in person. Though I did congratulate all of those teams in blogs/Facebook posts. Truth be told, I was bitter and I didn’t even want to see or face any of them (some more than others, LOL).
I knew something was really, really wrong and I had to do something about it. I tried tackling my own mind and emotions as a problem that needed to be solved. Why was I THIS upset? What was REALLY bothering me?
And I think I figured it out. I needed to play a “follow up” trivia game to counteract the tournament game. Better late than never? Mike and I will be going out for a game Saturday night for this sole purpose. It may go well, it may go poorly. It just needs to be played. Just coming up with this “solution” was enough to settle things greatly in my mind, so I’m hoping for the best! And I think I’m FINALLY ready to say “congratulations” to the players who were on winning teams that day (if you are reading this and are one of those players, please don’t think it’s totally weird that I’ve waited this long to do this). I’ll be sure to say congratulations next time I see you! I think I’m finally ready!
It’s looking like it will be a lovely day today. I’m thinking a nice hike in the woods might be a proper way to celebrate being out of the woods emotionally! And why not a couple of drinks on Zukey Lake Tavern’s rooftop patio?