Yes, I’m wasting time here. Waiting for the rain to let up a bit so I can pack the car. So here goes, with a list of some things I did in my life just one time – and never did again (and will likely never do again, though the day ain’t over, lol). No explanations, just single sentences…

It Was the First And Last Time I Ever…

Ate a corn dog

Camped at a camp site without an outhouse

Rode my bike home from the bar while drunk

Rode my bike at night without using any lights

Did a “pop-a-wheelie” on my bike

Mixed drinks using  Everclear in poor lighting

Me holding the bottle of doom, called “Golden Grain,” which was purchased in Louisville.

Drank “Hot Damn”

Called my mom a bitch

Went to an amusement park wearing brand-new shoes (not broken in at all)

Attended a beer festival with a hangover

Hiked a 2,200 foot elevation gain trail without bringing any water

Backhanded someone

Tripped someone on purpose

Dumped a beer over someone’s head

Posed topless in a photo

Geez you can even see my underwear (or were they “training pants”)! Mom – what were you THINKING?